If the world were a logical place, men would ride side-saddle.
To attract a man, wear a perfume called 'New Car Interior.'
Women like quiet men because they think they are listening.
On one issue at least, men and women agree; they both distrust women.
The men who try to do something and fail are infinitely better than those who try to do nothing and succeed.
Help a man when he is in trouble and he will remember you when he is in trouble again.
Show me a man with both feet firmly on the ground, and I will see a man who can't get his pants off!
Don't kick a man when he's down unless you're certain he won't get up.
Early to rise, early to bed, makes a man healthy but socially dead.
Man who sneezes without tissues takes matters into his own hands. (yuck)
Bachelor: the only man who has never told his wife a lie.
If you never want to see a man again, say, "I love you, I want to marry you, I want to have children." -- they leave skid marks. This works whether a man or woman says it.
There are easier things in life than finding a good man. Like Nailing Jello to a tree for instance.
Mankind is stupid. If you forget, they will remind you.
Men are like fish. Neither would get in trouble if they kept their mouths shut.
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